I walked downstairs for lunch today, doing as I had done all week and all the years prior, looking at the spot where Evan would lay and say, "Time for lunch! You ready to go outside?" and we would walk down the stairs side by side. I would make lunch while watching Evan bounce around in the backyard and then let him inside, and we would walk back up together.
This time last week, I still did not know. It will be a few more hours before the world will have stopped a week ago.
Tomorrow will be another hurdle.
But as I thought about this fact, that even a week ago, I had no idea, I was startled by what a gift Evan gave me. There was no long period of suffering, no diagnosis that required the terrible decisions about horrible treatments and whether he could survive them. He gave me all of himself, for as long as he had, as the wonderful lively companion I never deserved.
Thank you for that, Ev. Thank you for the amazing light you were in my life for the time I was given with you.